Grief and loss

Loss can occur suddenly, without rhyme or reason and can cause a huge shock to the system. It's hard to know what to do and you feel numb and exhausted. Some feel the need to talk; others feel the need to be silent. Some throw themselves into work; others take time to smell the roses.

As a dog the only real losses that i've suffered come from loosing a ball. Like when i was swimming in Sydney Harbour the other day - off Mrs Macquarie's Chair with the Harbour Bridge and Opera House in view. It was a magical day. The sun was shining, the tide was up so that i could dive in without hitting the rocks, and i was playing with one of my favourite balls.

And then it sank. Submerged into the water without a trace. No bubbles, Nothing.

i kept swimming around in circles, like a shark, trying to round the ball up, But, alas, it was not to be found. I started to panic a little, thinking that i had done something wrong, that it was my fault. i was angry with myself.

A lady commented to the Boss: “That’s unusual behaviour for a dog.”

“Yeah, he’s suffering some anxiety from loosing his ball. It just sunk,” He said,

The Boss called me over and pulled me out of the water. i shook myself dry and then he hugged me…. the best hug ever. The Boss went and found a surrogate ball – a used water bottle – but it was not the same. The wind caught it and it didn’t fly in the air anywhere near as well. And i had difficulty concentrating. i was stating to get tired, too.

We both knew it wasn’t right. So we gave up and started our walk back home.

And then i ran into Dennis. Dennis is the cute-ist male Silky Terrier that i know. He’s always happy, no matter what dog or bi-ped he sees. And when we saw each other, he wagged his tail like there was no tomorrow and it took my mind off what had just happened and i was OK again.

My boss suffered some loss today - the loss of a work colleague. No doubt He’s feeling like i did when i lost the ball. i get to spend tonight inside for a change. The Boss gets to hug me and hold me and pet me and i get to lick the salt from His face.

We both feel for each other and our loss.

Mates...….. a.k.a. ‘friends’

I’ve had a few mates over the past three-and-a-bit ‘human’ years. My best mate, at present, is Flip. i think he’s named appropriately because when we’re walking down the sidewalk, Flip tends to flip from the left to the right and back again. Sometimes, he’s also flipping annoying – but he’s a mate – and i put up with his idiosyncrasies – that’s what mates do.

Flip’s a cross - Red Cattle and Fox Terrier; perhaps there’s some Jack Russell thrown in as well. He’s a rescue dog, like me. So, we understand what it’s like to do it rough. He’s not as smart as me – and he’s no where near as independent, either. Although Flip is 12 months older, Flip knows that i’m ‘top dog’ because he’s smaller than me.

Flip and i have been mates for about 12 months or more. We tend to run into each other in Moore Park or Frog Hollow and both run and chase ball. We're both competitive and play well together and have never got into a fight; we respect each other’s capabilities. He’s got a good turn of speed and is probably quicker than me in a straight line. Flip also watches the ball better than me. But i’m always one step ahead. i look at where the ball is going to be thrown and focus on body language and 80% of the time get to the ball before Flip.

Flip stayed with Him and me for three weeks a few weeks ago. Flip’s Boss was moving house and needed somewhere for Flip to sleepover while his Boss moved out of his home, was in a temporary place, until they got their new place. It was the first time that Flip’s ever been away from his Boss since he was adopted at 16 weeks. So in four 'human' years, Flip has never had time to himself.

Flip is well brought up and he didn’t soil my backyard – thank Dog. We got to play together, he had a separate eating bowl (both the Boss and me later found out that Flip has never eaten from a bowl before – he was always hand fed!), and we got to sleep together. It was good to sleep with another warm body against me. Other dogs in the park have told me about how their Boss lets then sleep in the same bed. That doesn’t happen with my Boss. He makes me sleep outside, by myself, even during winter.

Flip sheds lots of hair. He’s white. So there was white hair everywhere around my place. But that was cool.... it was great to have a mate stay with me, for a change.

After about two weeks, Flip developed a nervous twitch and started biting the base of his tail. Flip’s boss and my Boss reckon it was due to separation anxiety from his Boss. You can see he's a little sad in this pic taken in our place when he stayed over. Flip went off his food and was really lethargic.

Eventually, Flip had to be taken to the Vet because the base of his tail started to get infected. Flip was put on some antibiotics. The vet shaved some hair off around the base of his tailand applyed some dressing to the wound. Flip needed to be bathed in salt water daily and kept clean. It made it hard for him to do ‘you know what’ – but it came good in a few days. His hair started growing back but the Boss thinks it will take about three months to be back to normal. i'll stand by him.

Flip always wants to play with me – well, who wouldn’t? He tries to bite my legs, my ears, my neck, my shoulders… anything to get me to play. Depending on where we are, i tend to ignore him and simply focus on what i’m bred for – herding, retrieving, and working. But sometimes, when the work is over and we want to have to fun, we play together and i rollover and play like a ‘sub’ bitch. We both know it’s just for fun, because i’m always ‘top dog’.


When Flip stayed with the Boss and me, we taught him a few things. Flip now knows which native grasses are good for his gut, and he now likes lying down in puddles and understands that when you’re hot, puddles cool you down. When the Boss is walking Flip, the Boss gets Flip to walk on the left, like me, and behind us - just so that Flip knows that he's third in the pecking order in our house.

There are a few other things that Flip and i’ll share with each other, over the next few 'human' years. That's what mates do – share the good times and grow old together, having some fun along the way. You learn a lot from your mates..... a.k.a. 'friends'.

He’s annoyed, i can tell

Two guys came to visit us the other morning. They were dressed in wet weather gear, had these uniforms on, and went inside and sat him down and talked for about an hour. Eventually they left and everyone was smiling.

But the Boss is still annoyed. The annoyance relates to me, i think.

The Boss was talking on the phone to one of his mates and i was listening. He said something about Council Rangers visiting and He having to make a statement. Then the Boss looked at me and scowled.

He saw me looking at Him and called me over after the phone call had finished and patted me and we played a little – not that the Boss plays with me much. He’s been doing that a bit more lately.

The Council Ranger thing relates to the yelling that happened in Frog Hollow the other day. The Boss wasn’t doing the yelling, it was the other guy. The Boss isn't concerned about the other guy. He said to his mate on the phone “You just never know what’s going on in some people’s lives and what has motivated them to take such action”. The Boss is really understanding, like that. i wish at times i could be as understanding.

Apparently there is an allegation of a ‘dog attack’. It’s quite technical, this 'dog attack' thing. If i put one paw forward, in front of another and lunge or growl, it’s considered a ‘dog attack’. Gosh, a dog attack occurs every moment of every day – and that’s just in my patch. These Council Rangers must be busy lads. Image if they were also policing human attacks - there would be a whole army of them!

The Frog Hollow incident relates to me and Groover playing. The Boss and i came to the park, without a ball, and Groover and his Boss kindly let us play fetch. i’m bigger, older and smarter than Groover – but together we were playing quite well, until…

Well, Groover growled at me, near his Boss. And i responded with a typical Blue Heeler nip. It’s not a real Blue Heeler nip, because i’m a little bit calmer due to the Smooth Collie cross, But it was still a nip and a nip counts as a ‘dog attack’ – although, i was provoked.

Groover’s Boss was understandably protective of Groover – and picked him up and held him. Meanwhile, i waited patiently for the ball to be thrown - even though i knew that i had done the wrong thing.

The other guy started screaming and yelling at the Boss. Stuff I can’t repeat on here. But there is one comment that i understood. “I know who you are and where you live”. Gosh, to me, that sounds like a threat or a promise - i can't remember which it is.

The other guy has two dogs. The French Bulldog has got his balls and smells really strange – it puts out this aroma that says “i’m better than you” and doesn’t understand the pecking order of life in the local park. The Boston Terrier is a bitch. she’s not my kind of bitch – a bit annoying really, but i guess you get that with bitches from time to time.

The Council Ranger stuff seems to have died down a little. Apparently, they’re ‘undertaking investigations’. The Boss is still a little annoyed with me, i can tell. Let’s hope it will pass and we can all live peacefully, as neighbours.